my feet are tingling. it's raining here again. the weather has been indecisive as of late and you can almost feel the pulling of the two seasons as they fight for the days remaining between them. the peacock is in the tree outside calling for the peahen who presumably is sitting on a clutch of eggs or has been taken by a predator. every car that drives by is answered by his meow-like call. i have a cut on my pinky finger that i'm not sure where it came from. i didn't go to the movies tonight like i had planned. instead, i put some corn gluten on the back garden where the wheat has sprouted, planted some oats and sunflower seeds by the creek, put some newspapers and grass clippings around the garlic, secured the meat birds pen a little more for the rainstorms to come, and sent away for about 50 sweet potatoes.
right now, i'm trying to track down the possible thief that took my money online for some rare breed chickens that i never received and actually looking into where corn gluten comes from. i'm not sure what i'm doing with the night. i have tomorrow off and am going to amish country to pick up 30 turkeys, the enterprise that i've been thinking about for quite awhile.
i don't know if it's the wet feet or the lack of plans for the night or the annoying cut on my pinky but i'm in this strange calm tonight almost to the point of numbness. my day went amazingly so far. i played in dirt, trimmed bushes, repotted plants, pet cats, watched chickens, and it rained and shined. my feet were wet most of the day, which could have thrown me off a bit, who knows. but my new job gave me two things that Triad never gave me. the first thing was a name tag. it's nice. it's got my name on it and lake cable nursery. i came in and it was jus sitting there by my time card. i like my boss. she's pretty chill. i got a bunch of free shirts AND a name tag. sweet. but then again... now everyone can pronounce my name wrong. ugh.
second thing that my job gave me today, drumroll please. are you ready for this? seriously, Triad would have never allowed this to happen, but i was sorting out wintered over perinneals when my boss informed me that i was getting a 50 cent raise! wohoo! i don't know where it came from or why, but it's awesome. i'm pretty happy. and it's not the money, i don't think because i'm still making a lot less than i was before. but it's just that she chatted with me and said that i was moving along and learning fast and she wanted to put me inside with more customers and in charge of more displays and whatnot, which is cool. i don't hate anyone that i work with and the customers for the most part are really fun... or at least funny to watch.
i guess i find is entertaining to watch people experience plants. some little old biddies that come in just coo and cackle like hens at the new bougenvilia or the hibiscus that are in bloom. they are only looking for the colors that they have loved for years and are always asking if we are going to have the same thing that they planted last year, that pretty flower... you know, the one that goes up with a little bit of pink and some broad leaves... oh you know, it looks like a daisy but then it doesn't.....
young couples come in looking for trees. recently, it has been this weird pink cherry tree that got published in one magazine and every couple in the area has got to have it. they all come in and say the name with hesitation, like i'm going to correct them, but instead i just apologize for us not carrying that variety, but show them the weeping cherries none-the-less to which they usually scrunch up their noses, look around the corner like i'm hiding something that looks better and then scoot out the back door when i'm not looking in order to continue their search for the cherry tree they saw in that one magazine.
i don't know a lot about shrubs, and lucky me, it seems like everyone that comes up to me asks a rather difficult question about a particular type of shrub to which i of course have to ask them if it is deciduous or evergreen. then i walk over to the correct mat and try to scramble to read the tags while bullshitting up questions to ask them about their hours of sunlight or how big they want the shrub to be. if i'm lucky, they ask about a rose because those all have pictures. just for once, i want someone to ask me what type of climbing vine they should get for their trellis or how to stake tomatoes. but meh, oh well. the more they ask, the more i learn.
in any case, i am learning quite a bit about pruning shrubs. i imagine when i'm pruning shrubs that i'm on a gardening show sometimes.
here's the script:
another very important aspect with the -out with the old, in with the new- spring cleanings, it is also important to remember your shrubs. it is best to prune in the spring or in the fall. by getting rid of the excess or some of the dead branches, your shrub will be much happier.
if you are timid about trimming, a surefire way to know that you are only taking what needs to go is to bend the branches. if they are brittle and snap, then they are dead and can be snipped off. if they are pliable, you can leave them.
if part of your shrub looks like it took a beating over the winter, just trim it out. this will encourage new growth and while it might look a bit lop-sided for a bit, don't worry. more sunlight and more energy will go to the remaining branches.
if you are overly brazen, take heed. some plants don't take too kindly to being hacked back in the spring. i have had housewives ask me why their hydrengeas are not blooming. i inquire i they pruned in the spring, which could be the cause and one woman's face turned beet red with anger as she screamed that her husband had after she told him not to and she was going to kill him for that! please, i cannot be held liable for a male with an itchy clipper finger. if you are scared for your hydrengeas, point him in the direction of some evergreens. men seem to like them and they are pretty forgiving as far as pruning goes.
le sigh. i guess that goes through my head while pruning, but then again, i do cooking shows in my head sometimes while cooking or surgical shows while examining a hen so i guess there's nothing odd about that.
anyway, it's a nice night, i'm trying to rehydrate myself and i like the achy feeling in my body right now. i'm two seconds away from folding up like a card table, i just have this feeling like there was something else that i had been dying to write about all day, but now my mind is terribly blank.
so anyway, here's my to do list:
-make shelter for turkeys
-get rid of mamma and baby raccoons
-email shrimp guy our shrimp order
-finish newspapering around the garlic
-try out my new router
-work on making my back deck a beautiful outdoor room with planters, refinished chairs, and possibly a potters wheel.
-give neighbors eggs
-ask neighbors about mooching off their internet so i don't have to pay for my own.
-order half dozen sized egg cartons so i don't have to give full dozens as free gifts and to expand the market to singles and other non-families who can't eat a dozen eggs.
-get grapevine out of the creek and make a few more wreathes
-water and plant more tomato plants in the basement
which leads me to my adios for the night. i can at least scratch off half of the last one withing the next five minutes. i can't believe how much i did get done today. i feel so accomplished. oh, i would also like to put a bird feeder by my window.
...not like i don't have enough birds already. sheesh.
Thursday, April 26, 2007
Sunday, April 22, 2007
worries away
so i'm sitting here with a phantom's voice reverberating into the back of my head, smelling faintly of campfires and fresh sawdust. i'm kinda a bit shaken tonight. the kind that leaves you sitting with the details still to be sketched out, but the base of it is there. i have a sunburn on the back of my neck that is tingling and making my skin feel tight. my throat is dry and i'm kinda hungry from my stomach, but my head is repulsed by the sound of food. over hot dogs, jason's blood sugar went crazy, something that has never happened. it seemed like a seizure or that he was laughing at something and so my brother and i started laughing with him, until he fell on the ground. he kept trying to eat but he couldn't, like his limbs all were controlled by a different switch that couldn't turn on. the shaking was terrifying and all i could think of was steel magnolias or at least the first 10 minutes of it when they get her juice.
it's a strange tingling all through your body, the feeling like nothing that you are doing is helping and i felt mostly like calling the hospital to make sure i was doing everything right. i don't know. i got ice cream. strawberry. preston got juice. apple
it's a strange tingling all through your body, the feeling like nothing that you are doing is helping and i felt mostly like calling the hospital to make sure i was doing everything right. i don't know. i got ice cream. strawberry. preston got juice. apple
Saturday, April 21, 2007
corn gluten
So, live is moving on at the pace of a river, just sliding along at some times and falling over rocks some other times.
First, my new job is amazing. I cannot exclaim enough how great it is to be outside all the time and not feel like an outsider. The people that I work with are amazing and the customers talk to me like I'm an instant expert... but I'm still learning so much. I don't know anything about flowering shrubs or ornamental trees and my knowledge of plants that I have not personally grown is limited. Lucky for me, I've grown quite a few plants in my day, so I can at least provide a bit of insight into certain questions.
Another great thing about my job is that I am learning to many new things that will be helpful to me around the park. Like corn gluten, an organic herbicide made from the by-product of chicken food. It does not allow any weed seeds to germinate but it doesn't harm plants with roots. I'm excited about having a garden that will be better than last year.
In any case, the internet is limited here and I'm typing over top of a couple of teenage boys yelling at a play station... hence there is not collecting of thoughts here. I will say that I got a new goat, Oliver and he is amazing. He follows me around like a puppy dog and cries when I leave. My family didn't get too mad at me and they all love him now. He went to church when dad did a children's sermon and charmed the entire congregation. It was funny to watch him interact with the 27 kids that were all petting him at once.
I am making lists of things in my brain that I have to do. The lists are pretty long and I feel half pressured and half excited about all of it. It's kinda like procratinating towards a deadline. Time passes and the season is almost time for planting. I'm on this strange clock now. It's weird that my calender is filled with --- hen went broody --- put quail eggs in the incubator --- last frost expected --- plant bulbs --- get turkeys --- ect. It's like everything has an end time in mind. It's another 6 weeks until the meat birds are ready for slaughter. If I get turkeys, I need to get them 6 months before they are eating size, which means I have to build a pen before the end of may or else I won't have them this year. The quail eggs are in the incubator, which means if I have a successful hatch, then I'll have to push to get a pen for them. The little chickies are almost ready to be put in with the big chickens, but I need to build another house. And over all of this, there is the blanket of the shrimp being put in the pool, no later than july but not before the church camp comes and swims. And then when will the harvest be. And how will I prepare for all of this. And what about............... hehe.
So, this is my brain on organic fertilizers. I'm excited and happy and somewhat content. I had another show with northern spy that went well. I wrote a new song that it awesome and I'm pretty tight with Joe the drummer. Norm kinda was off the whole show and Beth turned down so much that no one could hear her and after the show everyone said that she either looked bored or scared. It was a weird joint to play at, no booze, high lights, and the audience could talk to us between songs, which was kinda nice because I got to work on my stage banter. It was pretty weird at times when Norm would quit playing and Beth would kinda shudder in wonder of what she should be doing, but Joe and I were somehow still on the same page. I used to want a drum machine. Now I know that would not work at all.
I'm kinda frustrated still as we are at a standstill with shows. We have a good recording, but I suck at the mail and no one else is helping me out here. I guess it's just going to end up being one of those things that I suck it up and do it myself one of these nights. Norm just whines that he doesn't have the stuff or know what to do or blah blah blah and I'm kinda just done with all that. So I guess, like my boss says when he gets frustrated; if you want something done right... you've got to do it yourself.
Other than that, I've been ok. Jason has been a bit weird lately. I don't know. When I feel smothered, I kinda shut down and I think that makes him kinda upset, so he wants to hang out with me more and find out what's wrong, which is not what I need... and then we just get into a bigger hole. I'm just kinda adjusting to the new job. It's a lot of sleep and a lot of labor and I'm happy and sometimes I just want to decompress after it all. I don't know. We just chatted about it again and hopefully everything will work out. We'll see.
First, my new job is amazing. I cannot exclaim enough how great it is to be outside all the time and not feel like an outsider. The people that I work with are amazing and the customers talk to me like I'm an instant expert... but I'm still learning so much. I don't know anything about flowering shrubs or ornamental trees and my knowledge of plants that I have not personally grown is limited. Lucky for me, I've grown quite a few plants in my day, so I can at least provide a bit of insight into certain questions.
Another great thing about my job is that I am learning to many new things that will be helpful to me around the park. Like corn gluten, an organic herbicide made from the by-product of chicken food. It does not allow any weed seeds to germinate but it doesn't harm plants with roots. I'm excited about having a garden that will be better than last year.
In any case, the internet is limited here and I'm typing over top of a couple of teenage boys yelling at a play station... hence there is not collecting of thoughts here. I will say that I got a new goat, Oliver and he is amazing. He follows me around like a puppy dog and cries when I leave. My family didn't get too mad at me and they all love him now. He went to church when dad did a children's sermon and charmed the entire congregation. It was funny to watch him interact with the 27 kids that were all petting him at once.
I am making lists of things in my brain that I have to do. The lists are pretty long and I feel half pressured and half excited about all of it. It's kinda like procratinating towards a deadline. Time passes and the season is almost time for planting. I'm on this strange clock now. It's weird that my calender is filled with --- hen went broody --- put quail eggs in the incubator --- last frost expected --- plant bulbs --- get turkeys --- ect. It's like everything has an end time in mind. It's another 6 weeks until the meat birds are ready for slaughter. If I get turkeys, I need to get them 6 months before they are eating size, which means I have to build a pen before the end of may or else I won't have them this year. The quail eggs are in the incubator, which means if I have a successful hatch, then I'll have to push to get a pen for them. The little chickies are almost ready to be put in with the big chickens, but I need to build another house. And over all of this, there is the blanket of the shrimp being put in the pool, no later than july but not before the church camp comes and swims. And then when will the harvest be. And how will I prepare for all of this. And what about............... hehe.
So, this is my brain on organic fertilizers. I'm excited and happy and somewhat content. I had another show with northern spy that went well. I wrote a new song that it awesome and I'm pretty tight with Joe the drummer. Norm kinda was off the whole show and Beth turned down so much that no one could hear her and after the show everyone said that she either looked bored or scared. It was a weird joint to play at, no booze, high lights, and the audience could talk to us between songs, which was kinda nice because I got to work on my stage banter. It was pretty weird at times when Norm would quit playing and Beth would kinda shudder in wonder of what she should be doing, but Joe and I were somehow still on the same page. I used to want a drum machine. Now I know that would not work at all.
I'm kinda frustrated still as we are at a standstill with shows. We have a good recording, but I suck at the mail and no one else is helping me out here. I guess it's just going to end up being one of those things that I suck it up and do it myself one of these nights. Norm just whines that he doesn't have the stuff or know what to do or blah blah blah and I'm kinda just done with all that. So I guess, like my boss says when he gets frustrated; if you want something done right... you've got to do it yourself.
Other than that, I've been ok. Jason has been a bit weird lately. I don't know. When I feel smothered, I kinda shut down and I think that makes him kinda upset, so he wants to hang out with me more and find out what's wrong, which is not what I need... and then we just get into a bigger hole. I'm just kinda adjusting to the new job. It's a lot of sleep and a lot of labor and I'm happy and sometimes I just want to decompress after it all. I don't know. We just chatted about it again and hopefully everything will work out. We'll see.
Wednesday, April 4, 2007
pools of blood colagulating
So I guess right now I'm at a loss for words, well apparently not completely, but more of at a loss for verbal words. Flabbergasted, I believe would be the correct term for it as opposed to filibuster, which is where you can't shut up.
I was having a friendly morning-time conversation with my mom, I was checking my email and she was talking at me when she brought up going to visit her parents. My two brothers have agreed, the older of the two because he was never molested by my grandfather, and the other one agreed because he's on a crusade to get money for college and he thinks that he can squeeze pennies from them by a friendly visit. But the thing that puzzles me is that my sister in Florida is flying up from Florida to North Carolina just to spend Easter weekend with my terrible grandparents.
Reasons I don't want to go:
1) My family is staying in a hotel right next to my grandparents, which is not a cool, fun, hip location at all for a 20-something. In fact, there's little if anything to do except for hang out with my terrible grandparents.
2) My favorite uncle isn't even going to make it out for a visit because he works all weekend.
3) My not-so-favorite uncle will be there all weekend. He teases and it's not funny at all. He talks like my grandfather.
4) I have band practice on Thursday night. They are leaving on Thursday night.
5) I have to work on Saturday, even though it's going to be like 32 degrees.
So my mom just came in and told me that I should go just to show that he has no control over me. Wait. How does that work? Me giving up a weekend that I could be doing what I want in order to sit in a car for 8 hours there and 8 hours back just to watch my grandmother not be able to pick up a paintbrush and have my grandfather follow me around trying to apologize for... wait, he swears nothing but if I think it's something then he's sorry for whatever it was that might have happened.
You see, memory is a tricky thing. In an interrogation room, you put all the pressure on the witness / assailant to remember, but it all comes down to how you phrase the questions. You can implant ideas into their heads of things that we or weren't there. You can twist the story so much that even they don't know which way is up. Then the crime is twisted in a different light and you can believe something totally different.
I don't want to go. But here I am thinking well maybe....
My mom says that my grandmother would just die and go to heaven if she saw all of her grandchildren together for such a great holiday such as Easter. She's been saying that for years. But maybe she should have thought about that before she let her husband ruin her chances of that while she covered it up.
But then again, here I sit, waffling between thinking -well maybe they won't need me on Saturday - I could reschedule band practice - fuck that, I don't want them to take anymore from me than they already have.
I don't know. I'm kinda confused. And it sucks that my mom wouldn't just be like -hey, it's cool if you don't want to go. I understand.
But I don't think so. Blood is thicker than water... which I guess goes for dirty blood. But then, will I regret if I don't go and my grandmother dies?
Probably not. She's been saying that for years and I feel as though I made my peace last time. I don't need to waste another weekend feeling uncomfortable.
Off to work....
I was having a friendly morning-time conversation with my mom, I was checking my email and she was talking at me when she brought up going to visit her parents. My two brothers have agreed, the older of the two because he was never molested by my grandfather, and the other one agreed because he's on a crusade to get money for college and he thinks that he can squeeze pennies from them by a friendly visit. But the thing that puzzles me is that my sister in Florida is flying up from Florida to North Carolina just to spend Easter weekend with my terrible grandparents.
Reasons I don't want to go:
1) My family is staying in a hotel right next to my grandparents, which is not a cool, fun, hip location at all for a 20-something. In fact, there's little if anything to do except for hang out with my terrible grandparents.
2) My favorite uncle isn't even going to make it out for a visit because he works all weekend.
3) My not-so-favorite uncle will be there all weekend. He teases and it's not funny at all. He talks like my grandfather.
4) I have band practice on Thursday night. They are leaving on Thursday night.
5) I have to work on Saturday, even though it's going to be like 32 degrees.
So my mom just came in and told me that I should go just to show that he has no control over me. Wait. How does that work? Me giving up a weekend that I could be doing what I want in order to sit in a car for 8 hours there and 8 hours back just to watch my grandmother not be able to pick up a paintbrush and have my grandfather follow me around trying to apologize for... wait, he swears nothing but if I think it's something then he's sorry for whatever it was that might have happened.
You see, memory is a tricky thing. In an interrogation room, you put all the pressure on the witness / assailant to remember, but it all comes down to how you phrase the questions. You can implant ideas into their heads of things that we or weren't there. You can twist the story so much that even they don't know which way is up. Then the crime is twisted in a different light and you can believe something totally different.
I don't want to go. But here I am thinking well maybe....
My mom says that my grandmother would just die and go to heaven if she saw all of her grandchildren together for such a great holiday such as Easter. She's been saying that for years. But maybe she should have thought about that before she let her husband ruin her chances of that while she covered it up.
But then again, here I sit, waffling between thinking -well maybe they won't need me on Saturday - I could reschedule band practice - fuck that, I don't want them to take anymore from me than they already have.
I don't know. I'm kinda confused. And it sucks that my mom wouldn't just be like -hey, it's cool if you don't want to go. I understand.
But I don't think so. Blood is thicker than water... which I guess goes for dirty blood. But then, will I regret if I don't go and my grandmother dies?
Probably not. She's been saying that for years and I feel as though I made my peace last time. I don't need to waste another weekend feeling uncomfortable.
Off to work....
Sunday, April 1, 2007
so here's to a new day
It's the first of april. It's a new month. Normally that would mean paying rent, but this month, it's me waiting for my first paycheck from my new job. It's beautiful outside. Everything is starting to turn green.
Cheers to new things... new months, new jobs, and of course, new birds
So, where do I begin. As my lack of internet connection for 8 hours a day, holed up behind a desk is now no longer in my daily activities, updating my blog is also quite a bit more difficult... but then again, I'm not complaining a bit.
So, last Wed. was the first day of my new job. I went in pretty early and met everyone that works there, which is a total of about 5 people. I guess I went to high school with one of the girls and the token boy who works there recognized me from my picture in the paper from the shrimp fest article. I listened to the organic rep talk, which was interesting hearing about microbes used as fertilizer and amino acids and all that, a bit like science class while still trying to sell me things but whatever. Then after the rep left, I got to re-pot ferns, three different kinds. I was elbow deep in potting soil, sitting there in the warmth of the greenhouse when this little grey cat came up to me, meowed and then proceeded to climb onto my shoulders, resting it's head by my one ear while it's back end hung off my other shoulder. So I tried potting ferns with one hand in the dirt and the other hand petting this cat that just laid on me and purred. It was beautiful.
Then after repotting ferns, I weeded a bit out by the parking lot and talked to people about pansies. It was nice, I sold a flat of pink pansies to a woman and her two little girls. It was nice having the sun on my back and the wind in my hair and all that. I felt very industrious.
In any case, I've been doing really nice things around the greenhouse and my manager is really nice and the owner really liked my sweater with the mittens on it. The very old father of the owner schooled me in proper shovel use and every single muscle in my body is so terribly sore after every day. Yesterday was spent moving all the shade shrubs out of the cold frames and watering them. I did get to talk to a customer about tomato plants and it's funny conversing with other people who are inevitably trying to start planting a little too early for Ohio. I'd guess that there will be at least 10 more frosts before this winter is over, but I just hope it doesn't kill off the peaches.
So my brain is in overdrive right now, but unlike my old job, it's good daydreaming without the access to buy things, which means usually in one day I'm excited about buying something or starting a new project (soapmaking is hot on my brain) but then by the end of the day, I've talked myself out of it or moved on to another idea.
One thing that has been bothering me is my lack of food. I guess my last paycheck from Triad did not last nearly as long as I thought it would and I'm flat broke. I mean, I went to the Chiropractor, thank god I did (no more sinus pressure or allergies! wohoo!) but after I wrote that check, I checked my balance and you know that feeling that you are going to bounce a check and there is absoloutly nothing you can do about it. Yeah, that was it. So I guess my alignment was quite a bit more pricy than I expected. I think it was the week off in between the two jobs and Jason's birthday and some residual owing of things that I bought from behind the desk that kicked me in the ass in the end, but I did get kicked.
I guess part of it was that the hatchery finally billed me for my new babies. I ordered thirty or so laying hens and 10 meat birds. I opened the box to thirty or so laying hens and no meat birds. I called them and they sent me the meat birds the next day... but they sent 8 males for warmth as well, thereby making my male to femal ratio back in the red zone. Not fun. But I don't have the heart to kill them so I'm just kinda stuck right now. I'll wait until the first one attacks me or until they constantly crow to pick which ones are the first to go.
In any case, I've turned grouchy the past week. I think it's a combination of being terribly tired and sore and broke with no food at my house. The no food at my house forces me up to my parents house which allows them to barrage me with snide comments about my life choices. I'm kinda pissy a lot because my metabolism is going crazy with the extra calories that I'm burning and I eat like crazy now, but have no money. I try to pack a lunch, but after I eat it, I'm hungry again. I sleep like crazy now too. My hands are getting all cut up, which I don't mind.
in any case, I'm happy now that the callouses are growing on my hands instead of around my heart.
Cheers to new things... new months, new jobs, and of course, new birds
So, where do I begin. As my lack of internet connection for 8 hours a day, holed up behind a desk is now no longer in my daily activities, updating my blog is also quite a bit more difficult... but then again, I'm not complaining a bit.
So, last Wed. was the first day of my new job. I went in pretty early and met everyone that works there, which is a total of about 5 people. I guess I went to high school with one of the girls and the token boy who works there recognized me from my picture in the paper from the shrimp fest article. I listened to the organic rep talk, which was interesting hearing about microbes used as fertilizer and amino acids and all that, a bit like science class while still trying to sell me things but whatever. Then after the rep left, I got to re-pot ferns, three different kinds. I was elbow deep in potting soil, sitting there in the warmth of the greenhouse when this little grey cat came up to me, meowed and then proceeded to climb onto my shoulders, resting it's head by my one ear while it's back end hung off my other shoulder. So I tried potting ferns with one hand in the dirt and the other hand petting this cat that just laid on me and purred. It was beautiful.
Then after repotting ferns, I weeded a bit out by the parking lot and talked to people about pansies. It was nice, I sold a flat of pink pansies to a woman and her two little girls. It was nice having the sun on my back and the wind in my hair and all that. I felt very industrious.
In any case, I've been doing really nice things around the greenhouse and my manager is really nice and the owner really liked my sweater with the mittens on it. The very old father of the owner schooled me in proper shovel use and every single muscle in my body is so terribly sore after every day. Yesterday was spent moving all the shade shrubs out of the cold frames and watering them. I did get to talk to a customer about tomato plants and it's funny conversing with other people who are inevitably trying to start planting a little too early for Ohio. I'd guess that there will be at least 10 more frosts before this winter is over, but I just hope it doesn't kill off the peaches.
So my brain is in overdrive right now, but unlike my old job, it's good daydreaming without the access to buy things, which means usually in one day I'm excited about buying something or starting a new project (soapmaking is hot on my brain) but then by the end of the day, I've talked myself out of it or moved on to another idea.
One thing that has been bothering me is my lack of food. I guess my last paycheck from Triad did not last nearly as long as I thought it would and I'm flat broke. I mean, I went to the Chiropractor, thank god I did (no more sinus pressure or allergies! wohoo!) but after I wrote that check, I checked my balance and you know that feeling that you are going to bounce a check and there is absoloutly nothing you can do about it. Yeah, that was it. So I guess my alignment was quite a bit more pricy than I expected. I think it was the week off in between the two jobs and Jason's birthday and some residual owing of things that I bought from behind the desk that kicked me in the ass in the end, but I did get kicked.
I guess part of it was that the hatchery finally billed me for my new babies. I ordered thirty or so laying hens and 10 meat birds. I opened the box to thirty or so laying hens and no meat birds. I called them and they sent me the meat birds the next day... but they sent 8 males for warmth as well, thereby making my male to femal ratio back in the red zone. Not fun. But I don't have the heart to kill them so I'm just kinda stuck right now. I'll wait until the first one attacks me or until they constantly crow to pick which ones are the first to go.
In any case, I've turned grouchy the past week. I think it's a combination of being terribly tired and sore and broke with no food at my house. The no food at my house forces me up to my parents house which allows them to barrage me with snide comments about my life choices. I'm kinda pissy a lot because my metabolism is going crazy with the extra calories that I'm burning and I eat like crazy now, but have no money. I try to pack a lunch, but after I eat it, I'm hungry again. I sleep like crazy now too. My hands are getting all cut up, which I don't mind.
in any case, I'm happy now that the callouses are growing on my hands instead of around my heart.
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